Random Cuts of Meat

haven't checked in with the meat-maniacs lately, and given the string off big deaths lately, i figured i would let you know what i thought about them, and some other random stuff.

anybody else think the sham-wow guy teamed up with ronco and knocked off billy mays?

mark sanford was the hottest thing on the news, then michael jackson died. did the gop take out the king of pop to get there man outta the news?

speaking of sanford, why is everybody amazed that a political leader had an affair. i'm amazed it was 6 months between gubernatorial scandals. and hey, at least it was with a woman. thanks new jersey for makin' sc look better.

magnets are the 2nd coolest toy ever. big wheel is #1.

would it be racial profiling if you accused a white man in a white panel van of being an electrician?

i can't take credit for this being an original question but, if you had sex with a prostitute and didn't pay, would that be rape or shoplifting?

if you had a shower head made of gold, would that mean you took a golden shower?

Rockin' Robin. Tweet. Tweet.

what's with this twitter stuff? i believe the kids are callin' it "micro-bloggin'." i'm not sure if i should love it or hate it. i like that it allows you to blog daily, nightly and ever so rightly, but they are just snippets. they can be fun, but i don't need to know that you are giving you kid a bath. same goes for facebook status. that being said, i will eventually join the twitter craze and begin to tweet myself. i just need to learn how to conjugate twitter. (to tweet. twittered. twittering. tweeted. chirping? who knows) i figure it will allow me to go from thousands of followers on blogspot, to millions between twitter and blogspot. the next step after that, my own cable television show. but first i need a good twitter name.

heads will roll? sounds goth chick rocker like.
i fart in your general direction? to british humor
meats tweets? sounds dirty.
lengen-wait for it-dary tweeting? to barney stinson
headin' for good times with meat? a little long
abbey normal? i may have to check 'n see if that's available
meathead says? maybe...
meat's peeps? could be....

Arnold Style

went the entire weekend commando. it was a great weekend. the freedom. the ease of getting dressed, and undressed for that matter. it makes me wonder why more people don't do it. if you have never done it, i recommend you try it.
just in case you don't know, if you "go commando" it means you don't wear underwear. so nice. no adjusting the boxers. pulling the boxer-brief down, or pulling the Tighty Whitey outta the pooper. it just makes life easier.

10 Reasons to Like Canada. Because Most of us Need a Reason

with the stanley cup finals goin' on right now, that's hockey in case you were wondering, i decided i would compile a list of good things we get from canada.

11. poutin. aka gravy fries with topped with cheese curds. something so bad for you, must be good.

10. dan ackroyd. snl. blues brothers. coneheads. ghostbusters. bc of all that i will forgive him for teaming up with satan when he did "dish is a disease" campaign for charter.

9. alex trebek. mr. mustache is awesome. he has entertained us for years, and since he apparently doesn't age, he will be entertaining our great-great grandchildren also.

8. robin scherbatsky. shes a character from the show how i met your mother. its a fantastic show that has doogie howser on it. she constantly makes references to canadian life therefore teaching me what the great white north is truly like.

7. maine, vermont, new hampshire, minnesota, and the northern part of michigan. the only good things i can think of from these states is, the syrup and cheese we get from vermont. the twins from minnesota who provided us with one of the best world series all time in '91 when they beat the braves. new hampshire gave me my good friend sick nick goddard. maine gives us lobster. and i think we should give back the little northern finger part of michigan back we have no real use for it.

6. speaking of syrup. pure maple syrup is amazing. what better place to get maple syrup than a country with a maple leaf for a flag.

5. bigfoot. this one is tricky. his mother is from wisconsin, but his dad is from alberta. while they were visiting daddy bigfoot's parents baby bigfoot was born. but since his birth certificate says canadia on it, he is canadian.

4. the kids in the hall. best sketch comedy ever. old school snl is great, mad tv has its moments and in living color was awesome. just too many wayans'. kids in the hall dominates. i'm squishing your head!!

3. john candy. wow. i think his (large) body..... of work speaks for itself. a true comedic genius. he is missed every day someone sees one of his movies. especially when he teams up with another canadian hero dan ackroyd in the great outdoors.

2. bryan adams. guilty pleasure but without him, you think robin hood and maid marian would have gotten together in robin hood prince of thieves? plus summer of '69 is a great way to start a party. don't hate. you know you like it.

1. snow. litle known fact, its manufactured in northern calgary. shipping costs really keep us from getting it down here in the south, but its fun when it shows up. snowboarders thank you.

for all these reasons, i say, thanks canucks. you're not that bad after all. just keep these things comin' and take celine dion back and we'll call it even.